Take me out to the ball game…but leave your jersey at home

Posted: May 19, 2011 in Uncategorized

Hello again friends.  Today we will break away from the “what’s going on with me” vibe and go a little more…topical.

Spring has officially sprung (hell, it was summer hot last week) and that means festivals, pools, and the ever so popular trips to Turner Field to cheer on the Atlanta Braves.  It is a well known fact that while I am a fan of all things sports related, I do not particularly fancy baseball.  Do I understand the game?  Yes.  Do I know generally what’s going on in the MLB from week to week?  Yes. But I don’t derive much enjoyment from sitting out in the sun for 3-3.5 hours to watch roughly 14 minutes of action. I will say it’s a great way to kill a few hours and trading barbs about trivial nonsense is sometimes very entertaining…but not if the game is a 1:05pm start in the middle of June.  Thanks but no thanks; I’ll pass. All of this has no bearing on my main point which is uniforms and jerseys and when I feel they should be worn.

***Disclaimer: I might offend a few of you who like to rock a uni from time to time.  Please note that this isn’t a personal attack, it’s just how I feel.  We can still be friends.***

Now this isn’t just a baseball issue.  This goes for football, basketball, hockey, soccer, lacrosse, etc…If the sport has a uniform then this rule can be applied: if you are a MALE and old enough to carry a learners permit in your wallet, then you are too old to be wearing another mans name across your back.  Period. I feel that at that age (roughly 15 years old) it’s time to start making a name for yourself and becoming your “own man.” Also, it perpetuates the issue of players putting themselves before their teams.  As an (ex) athlete, I always played for the name on the front of the jersey, not the one on the back. I support schools that choose not to put the names of their players on the uniforms and I also applauded when Randy Shannon (ex coach of the University of Miami football team) took the names off of the uniforms to emphasize the commitment to team (I’m sure Phil Knight did not).  But, much like any other rule, there are exceptions.

1. Women can wear whatever they want.  I personally feel that a woman in one of those kids or women’s size jerseys is pretty damn cute.

2. Throwback jerseys are acceptable.  Let’s say once a player is eligible for the Hall of Fame ballot, their uniform can be considered and “throwback” and is then wearable.  This is usually 5 years after they have officially retired. ANNNNNNND it has to be a re-released OFFICIAL throwback.  I’m talking legit Mitchell & Ness and not one you’ve been saving for 17 years.

3. I support all team paraphernalia just as long as there is no name on the back.  Uniform that’s blank on the back (you see that in soccer), uniform with number and no name (college) or even a t-shirt of some sort all works for me.

4. The rule is lifted for any and all pranks or theme days/parties.

5. Personalized uniforms with your name and favorite number on the back don’t violate the rule but it’s just stupid so stay away from it.

I can honestly say, for a fact, that I have NEVER owned a jersey with a players name on the back.  Soccer jersey with a blank backside–yep.  College hoops jersey with just a number on the back–uh huh. But never, not a once, have I, will I, or let my unborn son wear one.

Man up!


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